Jelly Bean Prayer
RED is for the blood He gave,
YELLOW is for the sun so bright,
ORANGE is for the edge of night,
BLACK is for the sins we made,
WHITE is for the grace He gave,
PURPLE is for the hour of sorrow,
PINK is for the new tomorrow,
A bag of Jelly Beans,
colorful and sweet,
Is a prayer....Is a promise...Made to you and me
Hey! You got Treason all over my Blasphemy!
The Flag Code, which outlines the handling and display of the American flag, reads more like a blue law. It has been challenged twice as unconstitutional, and still continues to take a crass beating on a daily basis. You can read the entire text of the Flag Code here. And now, behold, some gift items found on the internet that violate the Flag Code and Good Taste.
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We don't quite understand the function of this other one, but it's a cover for a disposable lighter. |
 Smack the flag around
a nice grassy field, and then wipe your hands on another flag. |
 You won't have
Dick Nixon to kick around any more. Instead, you have these... |
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I'm fairly sure there's a metaphor hiding in this stuff somewhere... |
 To appropriately
dispose of the wrapper, please refer to the Flag
Code and use your Patriotic disposable lighter. |
 We throw this one
in to show that at the winter Olympics they violated the Flag
Code, Section 8(c). Surely someone has read the Flag Code besides
a few boyscouts and Get Lost Magazine staffers? |
The
Flag Code says nothing about smothering an eagle in United States
flags. Maybe they just didn't think of it.
More in the Lobbing, Kicking,
Smashing and Throwing the American Flag genre.